24
Feb
10

A Precious Gift

What a week it’s been in our household (and it’s only Wednesday)! Since this is an adoption blog, I won’t go into details but it’s safe to say that changes are on the horizon for our family. Changes that we’ve been hoping for and praying about for a couple of years now.

On top of news we received about upcoming changes, yesterday we received a very precious gift–photos and a letter from our son’s birth family.

If you’re a regular reader of this blog, you know that just a few months ago I blogged about the frustration of trying to establish contact with the birth family in an international adoption (“First Families” entry, October 2009). We’ve actually been trying since we were in Korea three and half years ago picking up our son.

For two years we sent letters and photos not knowing if the birth family was receiving them. Finally we learned that the birth family had checked the file. It was progress and inspired me to sent photos and letters on a regular and frequent basis.

Then yesterday we received an e-mail from our agency that contained both a letter and photos from the birth family. We were floored! It’s one of those things you hope for but aren’t sure you’ll ever receive. Our son was excited to see photos of his Korean family. He’s quite the artist these days so today he had to draw pictures for them that we could send drawings with our next letter.

As I said in my previous post, I realize that for some it’s controversial for adoptive parents to establish contact with the birth family. I’ve been of the opinion that what’s not established now, but may well be lost forever. The story of our son’s placement is somewhat different, and because of what it is, we’ve thought all along that having this connection early would be important for him as he grows. If communication continues between our families, as we hope it will, our son will certainly be able to end that contact if he wants to when he’s older. It is his family and that will be his choice.

But in the meantime we hope that now his Korean family is more real to him. Early on he understood who his foster family was because we had photos of them. But it’s been hard for him to comprehend a family that he hasn’t been able to see at all. Hopefully as he grows and has questions, he’ll be able to find the answers.

Yeah, it’s just a letter and some photos. But honestly it’s probably the best e-mail I’ve ever received!


1 Response to “A Precious Gift”


  1. April 1, 2010 at 8:03 pm

    What a gift for your son, and for you, to have the opportunity to have a relationship with his birth family from a young age.
    We have that now with my son’s halmoni and younger brother and it is so good for him. Hard at times, as he misses them and communication is difficult, but still very good.


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My Korean Culture Blog

Just a reminder that if you want to learn more about Korean culture (both traditional and pop culture), language resources, and cooking, check out my other blog: thekoreanway.wordpress.com It's filled with resources for adoptive families or anyone interested in Korean culture.

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